I’m sitting on the grass with you, we’re laughing and for just a moment my heart is careless and free. For just a moment I don’t have the overwhelming urge to cry. I look at you and you look back at me, we smile and take a drink. I can’t wrap my head around this. I’m handling it with kid gloves, afraid to grasp too hard and break what we have. Two months ago I would never have believed you and I would ever be friends again. Two months ago I wouldn’t even have spoken to you if I saw you in public. All it took was that little push, it’s amazing what Facebook can do.
That first night we went out and got coffee at Denny’s was the first night in a long time I was able to just enjoy being with another person. The more we hung out the more I realized how much I enjoy being with you. It’s not just that we have fun, not just that we can talk about anything and it’s not just that we can sit in a park with cheap beer and have the time of our lives. It’s that little feeling in the pit of my stomach that makes me smile, the fact that when I’m with you the rest of the world doesn’t matter. That just for a little while the raging torrent of hurt and pain inside of me settles and I can just enjoy being with you. When I was upset and hurt and said all I wanted was someone to hold me and just let me cry you were there, you held onto me and just told me over and over that things will be okay. You’re there without me having to ask, you can look at me and know immediately that something is wrong and you don’t run away, you don’t ignore it, you’re there to listen or just to let me cry. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you, you’ve kept me from drowning.
Sitting on the grass with you, talking about everything and nothing. You smile that little smile you give me as you tease me for drinking too slow and for smoking too slow. I smile back at you and tell you not to give me any lip, we laugh and go back to whatever we were talking about before. Everything changed, you’re the only anchor I’ve got in a world full of crazy.